All Of Me
by AkitoAkirit-chan
Summary: In a state of confusion when Ritsu ends up messing up his life,all Takano san can do is be a spectator
1. Prologue

_It was only today that I looked intently at the sky, lost in thought. The mosaic of blue and black hovering above me. It was as if the Sky was confused. It was lost..just like me. Whether to allow to black to take over or let the blue shine. I had no clue as to how I was to proceed into this little situation of mine. But as I saw the black taking over, droplets of rain starting to fall, I felt a certain feeling radiate through me. Uncertainity and fear..and sorrow. The rain drops stung my skin as they trickled down my body,forcing me to accept the impact. Black had won. Just like this..Will I also have to-_

"Ritsu..Ritsu..come inside..you are going to get wet."

 _My mother's voice broke my trance as I looked in her direction. I stared at her blankly as she kept calling my name out. But my mind was blank. I couldn't think of anything as I got up and walked to her, away from the sky and rain...escaping into nothingness,running away like a coward._


	2. Denial

"OI ONODERA STOP SLACKING AND GET TO WORK" I roared and saw Ritsu sit up lazily in the pile of books he was previously unconscious in.  
"Hai" He merely breathed as he sat down on his bench and continued working,unenthusiastically,unlike his usual self. He had taken leave for a whole week,for reasons unknown and had also not been home..and since then..something was..different  
"I want the report by evening,you hear me?!" I scolded him yet again to atleast get him to look at me but he just nodded,avoiding my gaze,lost in thought.  
"Ricchan's not feeling well, eh?" Kisa chirped as he rolled his chair to Ritsu's. But the latter didn't seem to reply. He just smiled and shook his head.  
"Kisa..are you almost done with your work?" I asked as he gulped.  
"I-I have a little-"  
"THEN GO AND WORK" I scolded as he rushed off to his desk,something Ritsu would usually do. He got up and walked out of the room. I followed him out.  
"Onodera" I called as he stood by the door,waiting for the machine to give the juice can. He turned to me upon hearing my voice and immediately looked away.  
"H-Hai?"  
"Are you feeling sick?" I asked him as I walked to his side,only to see him flinch in my presence.  
"No...I-I am fine..sorry for worrying you" He said as he tried to walk away but I blocked his path using my hand.  
"Are you hiding something?" I asked him and he jolted away from me.  
"I am not..Now please get back to work" He smiled as he tried to escape but yet again I pulled him to me,with the intention of kissing him. But as his lips approached mine,so did his hand that slapped me across my face.  
"Please stop doing this!" He panted,as if scared and ran back in.  
Did he just..slap me?

Ritsu had gone home rather early,of course with the intention of avoiding me like he did the whole day. It was starting to worry me,how he was behaving and I wanted to know the reason. And so I rang his doorbell.  
"W-Who is it?" His voice asked from the other side of the door. I didn't reply as if I did,I knew he would shut me out. I continued ringing his doorbell and when he finally opened it to peep out,I banged it open and barged into his house,not giving him the chance to even react.  
I locked the door behind me as he stood there surprised at my outburst.  
"TAKANO SAN YOU-"  
"Why did you leave without me?" I asked him as he walked to his room.  
"I felt like plus I never willingly walk with you..only you drag me along" He said as he tried to close his bedroom door on me again but I blocked it. "Ritsu stop running" I said as I pushed him onto the bed.  
He stared at me,shocked as our gaze locked.  
"You're finally looking" I said as he blushed as closed his eyes.  
"Let me go" He tried to push me away but I pressed my lips against his soft ones,shutting him up. His hands resisting but I pinned them down to the bed and his resistance crumbled.  
He gave into the kiss and I slipped my tongue into him. He moaned into my mouth as my hands slid down to his waist,caressing his skin. He jumped at my touch but I refused to pull back. I continued devouring his mouth but tasted salt. I opened my eyes to look at him...crying.  
"Please stop Takano san" He cried as his hands' weak attempt to push me back failed  
"Please..stop" He sobbed but I continued kissing him even more,tasting every bit of him,neglecting his pleas. I pulled back and dove to his neck,nibbling on his skin, eliciteing the sweetest moans. But as my hands slithered to his pants,unbuckling them,he gasped and pulled away from me,pushing me away.  
"PLEASE STOP DOING THIS, I'M GETTING MARRIED" He wailed loudly and crawled away from me,gasping,realizing what he'd just said.  
"W-What?" I asked. M-Marriage? S-So suddenly?  
"I-I didn't want you to get to know..this way" He sobbed as I just sat there,shocked,bitterness spreading through my whole body. I didn't know how to digest this. I want to know. Why he was getting married? There were so many questions..but all I managed to get out of my mouth which had now run dry..was...  
"Who?"  
He gasped as his red eyes turned to me as his lips whispered the name,shattering my heart.  
"N-Nao"


	3. Frenzy

It had been a month since it had been finalized. My wedding with the one person I never thought of in a romantic way, my best friend, the one who brought me up back on my feet after my horrendous experience with Takano-san, Nao Kiyomiya.

It all started a month ago. I asked Nao to accompany me on my visit to my mother, to decline the marriage proposal she had put forward. It would be the third girl I was going to reject. She believed that it was essential that I, the heir to the Onodera Publishing throne, had someone to lean on when I took over the company. A woman was best for that apparently. My pleas and my opinions fell on deaf ears. Neither my mom nor my dad took note of my views, though they were doing this in light of my best interests, I felt empty. I felt unwanted, no one bothered to listen to me, it was like I had no presence.

"WHY RITSU?! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE THIRD GIRL! YOU NEED TO MAKE UP YOUR MIND AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!", Ritsu's mother screamed.

"I DON'T WANT TO MARRY MOTHER! MY JOB TAKES PRECEDENCE OVER ALL OTHER MATTERS. MARRIAGE IS SOMETHING I'M NOT READY FOR YET! I'VE BARELY STARTED WORKING!", I screeched.

"Then tell me Ritsu, who do you want to marry? Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with? Why are you rejecting these wonderful ladies?", His mother bombarded him with questions.

"I don't know Ma! They weren't my type… I guess"

"Ritsu.. you have got to choose somebody. I want to see you secure in all ways before you take over, my boy."

"About that Ma, Nao and I came here to tell you-", Ritsu was cut off immediately by his mother.

"What? You two love each other? Gender makes no difference to me or your father. Do you want to marry Nao? Nao are you willing to stay with him for the rest of your lives?", Onodera's mom asked quite seriously. Both men were stumped for a while, no one knew how this came about, how his mother jumped to such a conclusion.

"Yes Ma'am, we-", Nao started but once again Onodera's mother had cut him off before he could complete his statement.

"THAT'S WONDERFUL! OH RITSU WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS BEFORE? THIS IS GREAT NEWS I MUST TELL YOUR FATHER ABOUT THIS!", Ritsu's mother exclaimed with joy.

"No mother, you are mistaken-"

It was too late. She had gone off to the main hall where Onodera's father was, to tell him about the recent events and Ritsu's compliance to marry Nao.

Preparations were made and guests invited. In the busy atmosphere of wedding preparations, Onodera couldn't find the time to explain the situation to his mother.

What shocked Ritsu was how fast his mother was moving things along with everything. She decided that the engagement party would be held a week from now and she already called Isaka-san, asking for permission to let Onodera take a week off from work as well as inviting him to the engagement party to which he gladly complied. He was feeling down. He didn't know how things had come to this. Nao sensed this and took Onodera to his room to have a nice long chat.

"Ritsu… I think this isn't a bad idea. Think about it. We've been friends since high school, we understand each other and what's more is that we know each other like the back of our hands.", Nao said making his tone and body as relaxed as possible so Ritsu could feel comfortable around him.

"But Nao.. Would you be willing to spend the rest of your life with me? You have your dreams and aspirations, you have your own life. What if someone else comes along? What if there's someone else you love? Would you be willing to leave it all?", Ritsu inquired genuinely concerned about his friend.

"That's the thing Ritsu… I- I've been in love with you ever since you let yourself go in front me, ever since you told me your experiences with Takano-san, ever since you showed me a multitude of expressions that accurately depicted what was going on in your head. I found myself thinking that I want to become the man Ritsu can lean on, someone who can protect him, someone who can love him and stay by his side. Ritsu… You're the only one I'll ever love."

Nao felt like a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders, he felt light, he felt great that he could finally tell Ritsu about his feelings. Ritsu on the other hand didn't know what to say. Part of him was happy and part of him was confused and angry. Onodera couldn't find the right words to reply to Nao. He only said Okay.

Nao was ecstatic. He went out with Onodera to search for wedding rings. It took them a full day to finally find the perfect set of rings. A simple platinum band with intricate designs.

The day had arrived. The day where he would officially be declared Nao's fiance. Not many people had come, he wanted the party to be kept amongst his family and his father's important colleagues.

The ceremony had been completed but it left Ritsu with a deep sense of emptiness. He wasn't paying attention to the party but was lost in his own thoughts. His mother's toast brought him back to reality.

"I'd like to thank all those who could make it here today. It's an important day for my son and it makes me glad that we could share it with you all. Ritsu has always kept to himself ever since he was a wee boy so this is a great day. I wish the two of you happiness and prosperity and success in all that you do."

Applause thundered through the hall with everyone cheering and congratulating the couple, while some preferred to talk about business with the future President of Onodera Publishing.

"Ritsu are you okay?", Nao asked after seeing Ritsu go a little pale.

"Yes…", He answered and was once again lost in his thoughts.


	4. Splintered

"N-Nao" He whispered,turning his gaze away from me.  
"W-When did t-this happen?" I asked as he wiped his tears.  
"L-Last week..It was..decided that..Nao and I..would get married in about a week or so and-"  
"And!?"  
"And that...I would..leave Marukawa and..take over the family business..." He mumbled.  
"L-Leave Marukawa? D-Don't you like this job-"  
"I'm sorry Takano san..But..It has been decided and nothing..can change it.." He answered rather firmly and stood up.  
"A-Ah I see...th-this is just some prank..Haha..you got me...Onodera..so now you can stop joking" I found myself holding onto a small thread of hope,desperately clinging onto it,hoping this is really was some childish prank he was pulling..to get back at me for how rude I am to him at work. But when I looked at him,waiting for an answer,he bowed his head and shook it,immediately cutting the thread I was gripping,letting me fall into an endless abyss.  
"O-Oh ...um...I see then...S-Sorry to disturb you then,huh? I-I'll get going now" I said as I got up,wobbling. My body felt as heavy as lead,not allowing me to move. My vision got blurry.  
"S-See you..at work then..Onodera" I smiled,rather bitterly as I walked out of the room as he followed. I felt tears pent up in my eyes as my whole body shivered.  
"Y-Yeah...see you tomorrow..Takano san" He said as I hurried out of his apartment,running to mine. And upon closing the door,my legs gave out as my body fell to the floor,tears bursting out of my eyes. It was getting hard to breathe,my chest was about to burst,my heart thumping recklessly,threatening to rip out of ny chest. I felt claustrophobic. These walls were suffocating me. Everything seemed to fall apart around me. Clutching my shirt,I wanted to rip it off. Is this what a panic attack feels like? Breathless and scary. I couldn't stop my tears from trickling down my face. I could hear cries..my cries..slowly turning into frightful screams. Marriage? He can't be...H-He already rejected the other girl..But now he...with Nao. Him and..Nao. I-It was supposed..to be me..Then why him..I thought..I was winning him over...Changing his heart,making him fall in love with me..but..what I failed..to notice..was that he never really..It never really was me. He is leaving me...again. All alone..I'll be all alone..again. Ritsu..Ritsu...Ritsu...don't...please don't..  
He just can't. What I feared the most...has already happened. And...It's excruciating..to even think about it. The pain is spreading through out my body..my screams ringing in my ears. The reality...was consuming me..It was pulling me into his fiery embrace. My hands digging into my scalp,pulling forcefully on the hair strands to get it all out of my brain. Making my brain accept that it was all just a reccuring nightmare...That I would get up the next day,Ritsu sleeping in my arms. But I knew that it was all in vain. Today..the brain had won over the heart. The brain had accepted the truth as the heart wailed in pain;crumbling into nothingness,leaving me hollow.

I had no idea what time it was when I came back home last night or where I had been the previous night. All I remember is drinking till I lost consciousness. I wonder what everyone at work must be thinking about why I didn't show up..wonder what Ritsu..must be thinking. Haha..Why will he be thinking about me..I-I mean nothing to him now,right? But...I don't think I ever meant anything to him. He...It was always me..pestering him continuously..forcing him to do it with me..never has he..consented what I do with him..I..raped him all this while. I-I am..so ..cruel..and selfish. It must've pained him to..  
I-I..How could I..to him..someone so delicate..  
Anger was starting to build up inside me..My whole body was shaking with wrath..I was angry..on myself..for forcing my..'love' onto him. How am I different from any other ..psychopath..a rapist? My fists banged the bed rest repeatedly as I screamed out of frustration,no different from yesterday,breaking everything in the room. I needed to cool my head..get back to work..but as I saw myself in the mirror..nothing but irritation filled me. Just looking at myself..I felt disgusted. I rammed my fists into the mirror..immediately breaking it as the shards pierced my knuckles,bleeding profusely. But I couldn't get myself to stop no matter how much it hurt. I pushed the mirror down as tears overflowed,the sorrow overwhelming me. I couldn't calm down. I deserved..to be punished..punished..to have loved someone I could never get. Whose love was almost impossible to earn. I couldn't even feel the stinging pain. My body was going numb as I panted deliriously,my knees giving out as I fell to the ground. I looked at my hands that were full of marks. I smirked. So this is love huh...

I smiled as I brought my knees to my face,balling up..accepting my fate..lying in my own mess.  
It hurts.

I sat in the cafe...enjoying my day off..rather pretending to..Everyone at work thinks I'm sick..I'm sure Ritsu knows the truth..But I was just not ready to face him yet..to..say it to his face that I had moved on and wished for his happiness..That won't be possible anytime soon considering how I'm feeling right now. A decent meal is what I think I needed...there's nothing at home...and I am in no mood to cook for myself..so I forced myself out,hoping I would not run into anyone from work. But God was never helpful was he?  
"Saga-san" A voice called me and I turned to it,immediately recognizing the owner.  
"Kiyomiya-kun" I looked ahead as he took a seat beside me.  
"Long time no see,eh?" He said,taking his seat beside me. But I decided to ignore him.  
"I see..You've heard then.." He asked and I knee very well what he was talking about,what he was trying to do;taunting me.  
"Heard what exactly?"  
"About my victory..." He grinned and the grip on my cup tightened.  
"I mean...I finally have Ritsu all to myself..and next week is the marriage..the pace of the things really thrills me" He said.  
"N-Next week? S-So soon" My voice cracked.  
"Soon? I'd say its a little late. Ritsu's mother was rather in a hurry to get us married as soon as possible." He giggled  
"Y-Yeah. W-Well I gotta get going" I said as I picked up my coat,in a hurry to leave.  
"Okay then..but Saga-san..please do come to the wedding..I'm sure it would mean a lot to Ritsu ..and me too of course." He patted my shoulder. This bastard. How dare he-  
"Takano san?" The soft voice called me and I immediately knew whose it was.  
Ritsu stood there,holding two cups in his hands as our gaze locked.  
"Ah Ritsu..thanks for fetching me the Coffee..I had a good chat with Saga-san here" Nao said as he took the coffee cups and put them onto the table,wrapping an arm around my beloved.  
"W-What are you doing here? Everyone at the company is worried" Ritsu spoke up as I looked away.  
"I just wanted some coffee..that's why I'm here..Why are you here ..slacking off from work?" I asked,avoiding his gaze.  
"I-"  
"We are looking around for a good place to buy some..suits you see..." He said as he inched closer to Ritsu.  
"S-Suits?"  
"Well yes..I mean..I really wanted him in a gown..but being a man..he needs a suit,right? Although Ritsu would look really cute in a gown..like he always does" Nao leaned closer to him and-  
My eyes widened as I saw his lips kiss Ritsu's. It was as if someone had shot an arrow right through my heart. Kiss? They really- Ritsu he...He pulled back shyly and looked away as Nao grinned. "Aw..so cute" He kissed his cheek and pulled him to him. It hurts. Real bad. I feel like throwing up. It was coming wasn't it? Another attack? I felt my heart race as my hands went numb. It was all so..weird..and not meant to be.  
"Now Saga san...see you later" Nao said as I realised I was leaving. Ritsu turned to me as I saw rings on their finger shining brightly. I smiled.  
"Yeah..See you later" I said and walked out of the cafe and did not even dare to look back as I knew that If I did..I wouldn't be able to let go of this feeling called love.

It was becoming a habit..coming home drunk. Drinking away my sorrows. But it was something I couldn't help. I had become a maniac at this point. I was losing it..and I really had to talk to Ritsu about ..everything that is happening,and I didnt care which state I asked him in,drunk or not,I needed some answers.I wobbled to my door and creaked it open but paused when I saw Nao exit Ritsu's place. I hid behind the door as Nao kissed my love on the cheek and left,stabbing me again. I mean..I could bare this. What else could happen,right? I rang the doorbell and Ritsu immediately opened the door..my eyes widening.  
"Takano san-" I pushed him to the ground as I closed the door behind me. This shirt...It's too big for him...I-It's not even his it's...it can't be..  
My hands had pinned him down as he didn't even try to resist. He just looked at me with his hazel eyes. He looked pale. Had he been eating? Was he too busy with..the wedding? A-And did he and Nao really..really..  
I tugged at his shirt as tears came to my eyes. I wanted to rip it off of him. I was already clutching the shirt,ready to tear it open but as I saw the fear in Ritsu's eyes...I pulled back..sitting against the door,covering my face as tears rolled out. He was supposed to be..mine..and yet he..It was too painful for me. Too painful to digest the fact that they had already become one...I could stop crying. I felt Ritsu's warm hands take my cold ones.  
"Takano-san.." I wrapped my fingers around his,putting my forehead to our intertwined fingers. Tears gushing out,such an embarrasment. But..to think that love would affect me so much scared me. Just how much control does emotion have on a person? How much..can just one emotion..break a human?  
My heart beat was echoing in my ears,my body felt numb. My throat ran dry but the only thing I managed to get out was..  
" _Why_?"


	5. Introspection

Onodera's PoV

I felt hurt. I could see I was hurting Takano-san and for some reason that hurt me. The past few days had been very eventful. On mother's insistence, I took a day off from work and went shopping with Nao, for our wedding suits. Everyone wanted me to wear a gown but I'm a man! There's no way I could wear a gown. Everyone around me is pretty insensitive about my feelings.

We spent our day roaming around the shops in Shibuya, searching for suitable suits before we chanced upon a wonderful, elegant Salvatore Ferragamo shop. We came out satisfied with our purchase. Nao bought himself a classic black full dress tail while I went for the same style but in a silken white model. We walked around for a while just roaming and talking. Despite being unhappy about this marriage, talking with Nao seemed to calm me down. He understood me and he reassured me that everything would be alright.

We finally found a cafe, a really nice quiet one with subdued ambience and light jazz playing in the background. It was the perfect place to relax really, a place where I could forget about matters at hand for a while. We selected what we wanted and Nao went to search for a place for us to sit. I was walking back with our coffee when I saw Nao talking to someone else so I made my way to him, kinda curious as to whom he was talking to. My heart stopped when I saw who it was. I wanted to run away and hide.

" _Ah Ritsu, thanks for fetching me the coffee. I had a good chat with Saga-san here"_

I was at a loss of words. The only thing I managed to say was

" _Ta-Takano-san, what are you doing here?"_

Takano-san dodged my question and asked me instead, what was I doing slacking off from work. Nao answered in my stead and then slowly leaned in and placed his lips on mine. I was so surprised. Why did Nao do that? Why did he do it in front of Takano-san? Was he trying to make Takano-san jealous as he knew he was the _Saga-senpai_ who broke my heart in high school?

I pulled back, shy and conscious of what had just happened. Before I realized it, I was blushing up to my ears. I didn't dare to look up at Takano-san. I didn't have to actually, he walked away before I could look up.

Pretty tired, I asked Nao if we could go back home. We made our way back to my house. As soon as we entered, I switched on the air conditioner because it was so ridiculously hot and asked Nao if he would want anything to drink. He refused and signalled for me to sit beside him. Well, I was pretty thirsty so I got myself a glassful of orange juice. We sat down and talked about trivial matters, our jobs, our friends and our school days. We had a pretty fun time until he started moving closer.

" _Ritsu…"_

He closed in and kissed me once again. This time deepening the kiss and sliding his tongue in, licking and sucking on my tongue. I tried pushing him off but I couldn't since I had the glass of juice in one hand. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his lap and started leaving hickeys all around my neck. I pushed myself away with my free hand and because of the force of the act, the glass slipped and fell onto my shirt. I was soaked. Soaked in orange juice. Could this day get any worse?

Anyway, Nao offered me his undershirt and I don't understand why he did so because we were at my house. But he insisted, so I took it from him, got a towel from the linen cupboard and walked to the bathroom to freshen up. I was in there for probably 15 minutes when I heard Nao talking on the phone. It must've been work-related since he was talking in a very formal and professional tone. As soon as I came out, he was standing right outside the bathroom waiting for me. I could tell he wanted to see me wearing his shirt, it's what those young girls call Boyfriend Shirt isn't it? He was pretty smitten and I could see that. He walked up to me gently whispered into my ear, complimenting how cute I looked in his T-shirt. He slowly backed off and told me that there was an urgent matter at work and he had to leave. I accompanied him to the front door to see him off. We said our goodbyes and he kissed me on the cheek before he left.

I hadn't realised that Takano-san saw what happened. Before I could close the door, he stuck his leg, jamming the door. He pushed and entered, throwing me on the floor. I was scared. Takano-san always used to do this but this time it was different. He was mad. His eyes were burning with rage and he looked at me dead in the eye. His hand was on my shirt. His grip tightening, he could've ripped my shirt. I guess that's what he wanted to do but stopped himself when he noticed the fear in my eyes and my trembling body. He got back up and slouched, his hands over his forehead. I heard sniffs and I soon realized that he was crying. I went forward to comfort him and took his cold hands into mine. He just blankly stared at our hands before kissing mine. I didn't like seeing Takano-san cry. It was the first time I did and I was sure I was the reason behind his tears. He looked up at me with bloodshot eyes and asked me " _Why?"_. I didn't know how to react, I didn't know what to say and how to explain myself without hurting him. Guilt was eating at me, I've been so unfair to him, I keep hurting him. He suddenly got up and ran out of the door, pretending not to hear me when I called out to him. My heart hurt, the sight of seeing him walk away from me hurt.


	6. Serenity

Takano PoV

I had taken too much time off and so I had to go back to work...only to see Ritsu distributing invitations.

"What?! Ricchan's getting married? And so suddenly at that" Kisa exclaimed rather loudly as Ritsu handed him the invitation.

"Y-Yeah..My mother really wanted me to..settle down" Ritsu said as he scratched his head.  
"You are getting married to ...Kiyomiya-kun! Onodera-san you..I didnt know you swing that way" Hatori was surprised as Ritsu blushed. Tch. Of course he blushed. It was that Nao they were talking about..why would'nt he?  
"Maa,but I always thought you would end up with Takano-san,considering how close you both are. I almost thought that the two of you were dating-" Kisa went on but it did nothing but annoy me.

"THERE WAS AND IS NOTHING BETWEEN US. NOW QUIT WASTING TIME AND GET TO WORK ALL OF YOU" I banged the table,startling everybody. I looked at Ritsu whom I just yesterday had pinned down upon seeing him in..Nao's shirt. After his body was made someone else's. Touched and caressed by someone else. He looked hurt at my sudden outburst. I clicked my tongue and stormed out of the room. I need a drink. I need to cool my head. I can't stay like this forever. I have to get over him. I sat down in the lounge as I sipped my drink that I collected from the machine when a vocie called me.  
"T-Takano san" It called and I very well knew who would call out to me with such a sweet voice.  
"What is it Onodera...I told you to go work didn't I? I said as I looked away but heard his footsteps approach me.  
He handed me the invitation.

"The marriage..is 2 days from now. I-I hope..you can make it. I-Im not trying to..hurt your feelings. I-It would mean..alot to me if you came..because..because.." He stammered as I got up to caress his cheek with one of my hand.  
"Because what..Ritsu?" I asked as he scrunched his eyes closed and whispered.

"Because you are special..to me..and having you there..will really..it really will..just..please come..please..Takano san. You'll be rid of me soon enough so please think of it as the last time..we uh...may see each other" He mumbled as his body quivered.

Haha...so cruel Ritsu..blackmailing me like that. Last time seeing each other eh..haha..I could tell he had mustered up all his courage to invite me. I smiled at him as I leaned closer to him. Upon seeing me lean closer,he flinched a little but did not move away,rather looked intently into my eyes and slowly closed them as my lips closed in on him. I smirked..you really are too cruel Ritsu. I kissed his forehead.

"See you later..Onodera" I said as his eyes snapped open upon feeling my lips on his forehead and he pulled away. I smiled and walked away..walked away from something I believed I could conquer,make mine.

Onodera PoV

2 days passed by too fast as the wedding preparation took most of the time. Even though I had given Takano san that invitation..now I regret it. Won't he ..be hurt when he sees me..? Won't I ..be hurt to see him like that? I..just wanted to..see him once more..before..I leave Marukawa and most probably even Japan. It's alot to take in for me and it will be ..very difficult to move away from the family I had created for myself. But as I stood here today,facing the mirror,looking at myself in a silk white suit,my heart ached even more. I..was getting married today. To..My best friend Nao. I should be happy,right? Many can only wish to spend their life with their best friend..I have the opportunity..then why am I..not happy? Why does it pain me to walk out there in front of all the crowd and take Nao as my..life partner? Why is it so scary? Is..this what they call cold feet before the wedding? Or..is it just me..not ready..yet..rather..not ready to marry Nao-  
"Ritsu..Its time to go,dear" My mom called me as she opened the door and smiled.

"Ah you look so handsome,Ritsu" She caressed my cheek.  
"T-Thank you,Mom" I smiled back at her as she patted my hand.  
"I-I'm so glad that you are getting married..and to the person you love" She said as something in my heart squeezed tightly.  
"You are happy with this marriage,right Ritsu?" She asked me and I got the urge to just shout the oppsite of what I said.

"Yeah..Y-You are happy..th-then I am happy" I smiled as my heart and mind battled. It felt so wrong. But it was the right thing to do. Nao..could..maybe keep me happy..and I could slowly and gradually get used to his touch. I mean his touch feels so weird..'cuz..It was Takano san's that made me weird like this. I would now live with Nao..spend my time with Nao.. eat with him. He would be the one to support me..like Takano san did. He would be the one to cheer me up,like Takano san did. He would be the one to take care of me and love me..like..Takano..san did. He would be the one in my heart like Takano san-

"Let's go then Ritsu" Mom snapped me out of my thoughts as she held my hand and guided me outside. I just..this marriage..I was getting anxious now...mixed feelings were starting to..No. No. Right now,there's only Nao.  
As my dad guided me to the altar like a bride,the guests stood up and turned to see me. The ceremony music played as I walked slowly towards the person I was going to spend my life with. The hall was decorated with white flowers and blue flowers. The chandelier above us shone brightly,lightijg up the whole hall. On either side of me,I found all my colleagues and relatives,here to bless me. Isaka-san,Kisa-san,Hatori-san..even An-chan was here..but..the only person..I awaited..Takano san..was..no where to be seen. Regardless,I walked ahead and into my vision came Nao,dressed in the black suit as he smiled upon seeing me. But as I approached him,my eyes fell onto a figure all to familar for me. It turned back and my eyes met the intense brown ones as my heart skipped a beat. Takano san..

H-He came..  
He smiled at me,filling my body with warmth.  
My eyes were set on him. He looked so elegant in his suit,his hair combed to the side and the his tie tied correctly. I chuckled when I recalled how it was always me who helped him do his tie..he could never..do it on his own. But today he did..he did dressed up..to..come and see me..one last time. Melancholy took over me as I walked up to Nao's side,my gaze still on Takano san until I was called out by Nao.

"Ritsu" He whispered and I turned to him.  
"S-Sorry..just a little..nervous" I said and he smiled. He turned to the priest and gestured him to begin.  
"Dearly beloved,we are gathered here in the sight of God,and in presence of family and friends to join together the two men in Holy Matrimony which is commended of St. Paul to be an honorable estate, instituted of God and therefore is not to be entered into unadvisedly or carelessly, but reverently, joyfully and in the love of God. Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. But before we begin,whosoever opposes this joining may speak up" The priest said and I turned to Takano san..just standing there,looking at me. Was I..did I want him to-

"Okay then. Please join hands." He said as Nao took my hands and I turned to see Takano san one last time. He smiled at me and nodded as the priest began. He turned around and walked away..away from me as I had did 10 years ago.  
He was...really leaving.

"Do you, Nao Kiyomiya, take Onodera Ritsu,to be your lawfully wedden husband, To love and cherish , For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health from this day forward?" He asked and Nao replied.  
"I do" He smiled as the priest turned to me.

My head filled with the thoughts of Takano san. This was the last time I was seeing him. And he is leaving already. I haven't even..said..goodbye to him. I..I-I just am not ready for it. To watch him leave. To watch someome to cared so deeply for him,someone who waited 10 years for me,someone who always stood by me. As I saw his figure disappear into the light,fear dawned over me. My feeling from 10 years ago were starting to return..I..wanted to..chase after him. Stop him. I had to..I had to stop him.

"Do you, Onodera Ritsu, take Nao Kiyomiya,to be your lawfully wedden husband, To love and cherish , For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health from this day forward?"He asked.

I-I...I can't let him leave. I have to run after him because..because I..  
It was now..that I realised.  
I love him.  
"Ritsu" Nao called and I turned to him as my huffed.  
My palms were sweating and my body was shaky. I looked at Nao with wide eyes as he expected an answer from me. But all I could say to him was..  
"Takano san.." I whispered and his eyes widened in shock.  
The priest cleared his throat,urging me to answer but I just couldnt. I had to know..if Nao was..if he..would let me go. I didn't want to break his heart.  
But his hands left mine and he looked up to me.

"Go" He smiled.

I flashed him a bright smile and immediately ran,mustering all the courage I had. Everyone stood up in surprise as they saw the supposed 'bride' run from the wedding. But I couldn't care less about them. I had to chase after Takano san...like I always had.

I ran out of onto the streets,looking for Takano san. He shouldn't have gone far. I have to find him. I have to tell him that it's only him for me. No one else. I was running out of breath but my feelings motivated me to keep running. And as I looked around,I saw him,standing by the lonely and empty bridge, looking down into the river beneath,leaning rather dangerously into the...or was he? No..No..he couldn't.  
He shouldn't.

He can't die. He can't jump. I saw him bending even more and fastened my pace. I ran to him as I called out to him and yanked him away from the railing,resulting in our fall.

"R-Ritsu-"

"ARE YOU MAD?! WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING ON,HUH? JUMP?! DIE AND LEAVE ME ALL ALONE. I RAN PUT OF MY WEDDING TO TELL YOU THAT I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO BE WITH YOU ONLY TO SEE YOU ENDING YOUR LIFE?! YOU STUPID IDIOT" I scolded him as I panted. He stared at me,dumbfounded at my confession which I unconsciously gave. I blushed as his hand caressed my cheek.

"Y-You l-love me?" He asked and I smiled.

"All of me belong only to you Takano san..only you" I said as my lips met his. I felt his lips curl into a smile as he wrapped his hands around me,kissing me deeply. His warm lips against mine for the first time in so long. It felt so good to be here. To feel him,his touch and attention all on me, the oh-so familiar touch which sent sparks through all of my body. I didn't care about the passersby. All I cared about was Takano san.

"Really?" He asked as he broke the kiss.

"Yup..really" I said and he pulled me into his embrace.

"I love you,Ritsu" He said and I smiled.

"I love you too,Masamune san"

"You know...I wasn't really gonna jump. I was just looking at the fish."

"Eh?"

"I was gonna go home and get drunk...but seems like the little misunderstanding got you to me" He kissed my cheek and I blushed at my mistake. Well,whatever. I hugged him,taking in all of him. He belonged solely to me.

"Yeah it did and you have a lifetime to tease me about it"


End file.
